Feel like I can’t get out of it. Let the holiday squeezing begin. Just when I think things were getting easier in my life. Crash. Literally. I am beside myself with anxiety. The damage on my car will probably exceed $800 and all I can do is rehearse the incident over and over again in my head. Why did I overcorrect? If I hadn’t, my steering would be fine. Damn. And to top it off, I don’t know if I will have a job in two weeks. I almost cried when I found out what is exactly wrong. All I can think of is William Cowper’s hymn, “God Moves in a Mysterious Way”:

God moves in a mysterious way
His wonders to perform;
He plants His footsteps in the sea,
And rides upon the storm.

Deep in unfathomable mines
Of never-failing skill
He treasures up His bright designs,
And works His sovereign will.

Ye fearful saints, fresh courage take,
The clouds ye so much dread
Are big with mercy, and shall break
In blessings on your head.

Judge not the Lord by feeble sense,
But trust Him for His grace;
Behind a frowning providence
He hides a smiling face.

His purposes will ripen fast,
Unfolding every hour;
The bud may have a bitter taste,
But sweet will be the flower.

Blind unbelief is sure to err,
And scan his work in vain;
God is His own interpreter,
And He will make it plain.

God, thank you for William Cowper. I feel incredibly hopeless but all I have is future grace. Satisfy me not with the things of this world. Capture me by the beauty of your infinite glory. Suck me in. Absorb me. I am staring at the cloud and I can’t wait to see your grinning face.